well hello Insomnia why yes I am still up and awake… You do know that I have a full day in town tomorrow the Dr wants some test on my neck done things like MRI,CT you know fun shitt…Dad has blood work to be done as well we have to stop over to his Dr office for a minute then we have to go to the bank make some bills out before we leave and drop them off and um my desk looks like a damn Texas Tornado hit it ….NO JOKE!!!
Since my Fibromyalgia started to peak its ugly mean azz head out I have not been able to do much in keeping things organized like my desk things like that so things have been put on hold as it got worse …I knew it was coming but I was still trying to get things done but with brain fog and shitt it just was not going to happen today Shitt I already feel like calling the MRI place and make it for another day but you all know with chronic illnesses you are not sure when you will feel up to doing something and I really need to get dad his blood work and bank and blah,blah lol….
I have taken my bedtime medication like a good girl um that first dose was around 9pm and I laid in bed and just laying down caused pain I did try for longer than I could really stand hell my feet were going back and forth since I was agitated so I got up out of bed..around 11pm I took my last dose of sleeping medication (I start with the lowest dose first) and well again here I am AWAKE!!!..WOOHOO!!!..Even the pain from my pj’s cause discomfort I am thinking about taking a low dose of Prednesone (I know I spelled that wrong)( aka the bitch pill)also that will keep you up as well.. but fuck at this point I do not care the pain in my back is killing me since I have been up so long I am about ready to take a half of a pain pill but usually never have one after 4ish or 5ish pm every once in a while laying down helps with the pain of that but looks like that is not an option now does it lol..
So here I am still awake thinking about starting my day .. Make some coffeeee (I wish coffee gave me energy) then take a shower and with that brings more pain at times since the water hitting my skin hurts but at least I would not have to do it tomorrow and I could get most of my hair dry lol so I could undo my hair and I wanted to play with my makeup so I thought about wearing some for the day out but would not put that one till around 10:00am or so (I like no look makeup on myself) it differs with the plans of course and I do not wear makeup everyday at all… I could make some noise and make out a few checks that have to be drop off and paid tomorrow and make some deposit slips and things like that ( I believe and hope that I still have a desk somewhere under all this mess) SO NOT ME…everything has a place so this bothers me to no end…
We may get home by 5pm I have to be at my appointment at 1pm and I told the guys that I would cut their hair when we got back home and with my fibro and pain and no sleep oohhh hell I think it just might be a day from hell and I DO NOT WANT TO COME HOME AND LAY DOWN AND SCREW MY SYSTEM UP EVEN MORE!!!!…..We all know how one feels when they have not slept in many hours “loopy” and yuck I do not want to be that way….
Well it is 5:10AM…. and my pain level is a hard 10 : ( I think that I will start the coffeeeee and take my morning medications and take a shower or bath..nah shower this time …
What helps you sleep when you have nights like this? or weeks like this?? and relief from spasm all on my back ? Any advice anyone? Insomnia,Fibromyalgia and lupus and chronic pain all the invisible illnesses … The ones people look you in the eye and can not see the rough shape that one is in or tell the fake smile from a real smile from you..the silent disease that makes us scream at the top of our lungs but only to be heard in our own brains……
4/11/16
sue's space 