Category Archives: blogging

The Happiness Tag

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Thank you to my blogging sister and friend,

The Happiness Taglifeofanelpasowoman.com

for nominating me to participate in the Happiness tag. You are such an amazing gurl and so much fun…Thank you!!!!….It’s a short but fun challenge so why not do it. The rules are included below:

List
5. Things that make you happy.
5. Songs that make you happy.
5. Bloggers that make you happy. Let them know you nominate them and you are done.

Five things that make me happy

  1. My family : ) My blogging family without you all I would not be doing this..I have so much fun on here with everyone interacting getting to know other more each day..Laughing and crying ..We are all here for each other and it makes me happy to know that I have true family and friends on here….
  2. Chocolate ice cream..enough said… : )
  3. That we are starting  back on our house it is an old house from the 1800’s we were still working on it when dad got hurt but had to stop so we are back on working and getting it finished(at least the outside for now)  but it is going to take baby steps and a lot of time..But so happy
  4. Working with rescue dogs and placing them in a great forever home…Training them to be indoor and outdoor dogs and to teach them tricks and things like to sit and shake and play with them …
  5. Oh I love to cook homemade anything the kitchen is one of my favorite places to be…Like the holidays I love doing it all.. Cheese spread and chips and homemade dips all the works……

five songs that make me happy

This is so very hard for me since I love musik….

  1. Paul Van Dyke Let go… https://youtu.be/myH1GDY03S4
  2. Tiesto Love comes again… https://youtu.be/yYwLLyy-hZQ
  3. Nelly Furtado Say it right… https://youtu.be/6JnGBs88sL0
  4. Justin Timberlake What goes around…comes around  https://youtu.be/TOrnUquxtwA
  5. Sir mix a lot Baby got back lol …https://youtu.be/kY84MRnxVzo

I would love for the following five bloggers to take this challenge:

          1. https://tessacandoit.com/
          2.  https://sheldonkleemanartworks.com/
          3. https://elementhealing.wordpress.com/
          4. https://polishingdookie.wordpress.com/
          5. https://oscardandelion.wordpress.com/

 

Texas…Rain…

Since here in HOTT AZZ Texas everyone may have been seeing that we have been getting so much rain..Getting hit very hard with this rain and more rain and did I mention RAIN!!!??? and some areas are or have been flooding some people have lost everything my heart goes out to those people it really does…It would break my heart to have ruin pictures things like that…

The last two years it has been this way rain, rain and more rain and flooding at this time of year so I thought since I have rain on my brain I would play some of my tunes that has …Yup you guessed it rain in them…

The first one is my man Tiesto it’s an older song but I seem to like it better than the newer musik he has been putting out…… ANYWAYS IT’S GOOD MUSIK AND YOU NEED A BREAK ANYWAYS..SO JUST DO DUE IT!!!LOL

Side note..It has not rained as of yet today so that is the good side of things..I wanted to add more videos but nope can’t do that so these are the two for now…Hope you enjoy : )

If it rains and we were together I will always share my umbrella (Well if I could find it)lol but I love the rain so I would probably just give you the umbrella ….Have a wonderful day and let it rain down on you…

 

Here is Eurythmics so much talent as a group or on her own…

Plunge Me In…

Plunge me in the river Jordan….

Baptize , Submerge me in the depths of all its faiths …That has been before me…

All love…No hate…

Lets get out of this ill state…We are all in…

Lift me up cleanse me from the filth …Lift me out of the hate of our worlds fate…

Take my clothes off my back…Take all my belongings…

Take what you need from me..take it all…burn it…

Nothing left to hide…Nothing left to bare …And I don’t fucking care…

Fire intensifies …Hair on my arms are burning …

You took everything even the ones I had on…

You pushed me…Into the flames…

It’s just me…My soul…

Close your eyes …Tell me what you see…

Touch my body…What do you feel…

Touch my chest…Do you feel it beating?…

Like a Phoenix rises from its ashes…

I rise again…

 

 

 

*Picture from Google….

 

 

 

Die Devil Die…

Just as you plan your day and feel ok all hell breaks loose as I fall to your bed and crumble in a ball your brain overloaded…. sensors going off as I just want to jump off….Don’t get to close to the edge…. I just might… .take a leap a leap of faith maybe today maybe tomorrow all of this sorrow all this pain will fade away as I pray to take it away…As I sit and wait to get on the sea saw of life it all starts again….. like Satan with an evil grin ..I return while you are awake I return as you try to sleep with evil laughter he states I won’t give you breaks only give you possibility of more than you can take… again evil nights evil days same time same place…. I am here to take the place…. of once was your happiness the things you once enjoyed to only remind you of what once was could never be… I am a prisoner of this disease….. I look in the mirror and to the horror it’s ME with the evil grin and red eyes …awake or in dream land and can’t escape… what is real what is fake…. this pain is present for Gods sake…. I drop to my knees with nothing left I am done… don’t want to go on…. where did I put the fucking gun…while my head spins sweat pours down me I can’t take this where is the door… I want to run… I want to hide… why don’t I just die… Evilness of this disease why me..should I had even asked….the evil grin and red eyes are back I feel it… it hurts all over ..there is a monster inside of me..it’s Satan… or so I thought……. It’s just me and my pain of this disease …same time same place ..please take me to that happy place…if only for 5 minutes or 10 I will take what relief I can…..I guess that I will just put on that fake azz smile once again…another day another night….a prisoner trapped in my own self a self I have grown to hate……..

I want to thank my Dear friend https://sheldonkleemanartworks.com/

Please check out his amazing work at the above link….He is the reason, inspiration behind this blog post..Without you Mr Sheldon this blog post would not had happened …Thank you from the bottom of my heart…

Suzette

IGNORANCE is NOT BLISS..I/WE/US..

“And some people around you only make things worse”….. How TRUE this statement is.. I know when I am at my WORST I try to stay to MYSELF since I could GO OFF at any given moment and I really DON’T want to HURT SOMEONE’S FEELINGS…(I HAVE CONTROL)most of the TIME…. BUT when the PAIN you have is so INTENSE ALL RULES go OUT the DOOR and no matter how HARD you TRY to keep your KOOL you’ve done LOST IT…WE all should KNOW by NOW how PAIN DIFFERS from one PERSON to ANOTHER even WITH the SAME MEDICATIONS..Some people just DON’T GET IT!!! .. that NO good for NOTHING scale they use you know the one with the SMILE face on it.. YEAH WELL Sometimes when I hurt I can still PUT ON that fake azz SMILE ( I am good at that) & I’m sure others are just as good at it too…At times..I/WE/US.. have to be…
But other times if one could really hear the SCREAMS that are going on in my HEAD and how ALONE I feel PHYSICALLY,MENTALLY it EFFECTS the WHOLE BODY and know that I am doing EVERYTHING to FIGHT BACK the TEARS and knowing I would LIKE to BREAK things or BANG my HEAD AGAINST a BRICK WALL !!!… I sometimes JUST CRY in the shower that way no one can tell (being wet) or when I wash my face in the morning/night OH I just got SOAP in my eyes…. I’m LUCKY to have a SUPPORT system like I have…MANY DON’T….. I CAN CRY,SCREAM,SHOUT and just be QUITE if I NEED…..THEY are here for ME….
I remember when SO CALLED FAMILY would ask how I was doing(THEY NEVER CALLED ME or ASKED ME..THEY would ASK my MOM) HOW NICE HUH??!!. WE are HAPPY to HAVE THEM ALL OUT of OUR LIFE!!!…..If ANYONE TELLS ME that EVERYTHING is OK or it’s NOT THAT BAD and it will PASS or it’s ALL IN YOUR HEAD that you can’t BE that SICK and in PAIN ALL THE TIME or well you TAKE pain MEDICATION that should be ENOUGH!!..( I WILL BASH HEADS TOGETHER!!!!)…I GET this ALL the TIME from IGNORANT/CLUELESS HEARTLESS/MOTHERFUCKERS >>>> I know IF I TOOK what YOUR taking I WOULD be KNOCKED OUT and PASSED out IN BED… So YOUR SITTING here so it must NOT be THAT BAD….I/WE/US>>> NEED to GET RID of the NEGATIVE ONES IN OUR LIFE!!..THEY are the ONES that MAKE things WORSE..THEY wear ROSE COLORED SUNGLASSES so that EVERYTHING THEY SEE is FINE (IN the WORLD THEY LIVE IN)and try to put FORTH LIES about OUR LIFE SAYING I’m NOT ILL..or WE are NOT ILL…..I/WE/US NEED to GET RID OF these NARROW minded PEOPLE…Ones like these ARE NOT worth HAVING IN and AROUND US..I have LEARNED that these PEOPLE and MANY others are almost the LEAST EDUCATED/BIG AZZ DUMB FUCKERS(or in short what I call them( DFers) when it comes to INVISIBLE CHRONIC ILLNESSES but THEY THINK that THEY are the MOST EDUCATED …What BREAKS MY HEART is that YOU tell them what all YOU have and all THEY say is OH (SHOWING THEY DON’T CARE) told MANY to LOOK it UP on the INTERNET!!..And I get I will LATER) I know THIS NEVER happens SINCE when WE would see or THEY call mom THEY would ASK HER>>>WHATS wrong with SUZETTE HOW CAN SHE STILL BE ILL>>like a FUCKING RECORD PLAYER…if THEY TAKE the TIME to LOOK up the INFORMATION that was told in the first place THEY WOULD KNOW..

IGNORANCE IS NOT BLISS……….

ALSO:….
I/WE/US>>> CAN’T JUDGE one persons chronic PAIN level with ANOTHER persons chronic pain level or PAIN in general EVERYONE FEELS PAIN DIFFERENTLY as well as others RESPOND DIFFERENT to it. What WORKS for ONE person may NOT work FOR the OTHER or as well as the other but SAME MEDICATION again everyone response differently to pain and medications given out…..
So with all these INVISIBLE CHRONIC ILLNESSES out in OUR world TRY hard NOT to JUDGE ..when you THINK you see a PERFECTLY fine person getting OUT of the CAR that is PARKED in the HANDICAPPED space JUST try to REMEMBER they ALSO maybe SUFFERING in SILENCE……LIKE… I….WE…US…

ALSO:…. I/WE/US>>> have ENOUGH NEGATIVE  PEOPLE and THINGS that go ON IN OUR LIFE ..LETS BRING IN MORE POSITIVE and LEAVE the NEGATIVE GARBAGE for TRASH DAY..

 

 

May is Lupus Awareness Month

imageslupusI believe this is great information… but I feel like it’s cold and just touching the surface… Wanted to share anyways… I did not write this I just wanted to share as this Lupus kicks my unhappy azz everyday…..I still look forward to each day in hope that tomorrow will be better…As always I hang in there the best I know how…Also I have the organ threatening lupus ..Anyways I hope this can shed some light to a caregiver or a loved one or just anyone…

 

http://www.lupus.org/action/lupus-awareness-month-facts

Lupus Awareness Month Facts

Lupus Awareness Month is observed during May to increase public understanding of this cruel and mysterious disease that ravages different part of the body. Spread the word and share these facts on your Facebook and Twitter.

Visite esta página, si desea ver datos en español


May 1. Lupus is an unpredictable, chronic autoimmune disease that ravages different parts of the body.

May 2. In lupus, something goes wrong with the immune system, the part of the body that fights off viruses, bacteria, and germs. The result is the production of autoantibodies that cause inflammation.

May 3. Ninety percent of the people who develop lupus are women, though men can also develop lupus and their disease can affect some organs more severely.

May 4. Most often, lupus develops between ages 15 and 44.  However, between 10 and 20 percent of cases develop during childhood and these cases can evolve into serious health complications more rapidly.

May 5. African Americans, Hispanics/Latinos, Asians and Pacific Islanders, and Native Americans are diagnosed with lupus two or three times more frequently than Caucasians; however, lupus affects people of all races and ethnicities.

May 6. Lupus is not contagious and cannot be “given” to another person.

May 7. To make a lupus diagnosis, doctors evaluate a patient’s current symptoms, lab test results, personal medical history and family medical history.

May 8. Lupus can affect any organ system of the body, including the heart, kidneys, lungs, blood, joints and skin.

May 9. The malar, or “butterfly” rash on the face is present in an estimated one-third of people with lupus. This flat, reddish rash across the bridge of the nose and cheeks often is the only outward symptom of lupus (though other signs and symptoms might be present).

May 10. Though all pregnancies of women with lupus are considered “high risk”, advancing technology and a better understanding of the disease have improved pregnancy outcomes. Today, 80 percent of women with lupus symptoms that are not active can have successful pregnancies.

May 11. Lupus is not a form of arthritis, but many people with lupus do suffer from joint and/or muscle pain

May 12. Among people with lupus that affects the skin, poor mental health is common and has been found to be similar or worse than mental health among those with type 2 diabetes, recent heart attack, heart failure and high blood pressure.

May 13. People with lupus have two times the risk of developing cardiovascular disease than do people without lupus.

May 14. Nearly 3 in 4 people with lupus surveyed (76 percent) said fatigue limits their ability to participate in social activities.

May 15. An estimated 1.5 million Americans and 5 million people worldwide are living with lupus.

May 16. Factors that may trigger a lupus flare include infections, ultraviolet light, stress, some medications, environment with some still unknown.

May 17. Many symptoms of lupus imitate those of other illnesses, and can come and go over time, making diagnosis difficult.
Week 4

May 18. Based on a recent study, it takes an average of six years for people with lupus to be diagnosed from the time they first notice their lupus symptoms.

May 19. A majority of people with lupus surveyed (63 percent) report being incorrectly diagnosed. Of those reporting an incorrect diagnosis, more than half of them (55 percent) report seeing four or more different health care providers for their lupus symptoms before being accurately diagnosed.

May 20. First degree relatives of people with lupus (parent, sibling or child) have six times the risk of developing the disease.

May 21. Sensitivity to ultraviolet light (present in both sunlight and artificial light) affects as many as two thirds of individuals with lupus, and may cause fever, debilitating fatigue, joint pain, rashes and other symptoms.

May 22. Of the 23 percent of people with lupus who experience severe lupus flares, all or most of the time over the last three months, 40 percent were admitted to the hospital at least once during the past 12 months, with an average stay of 10.5 days.

May 23. 40 percent of adults with lupus and as many as 66% of all children with lupus will develop kidney complications.

May 24. Almost three-quarters (74 percent) of caregivers report that caring for someone with lupus has an impact on their work productivity.

May 25. More than half (55 percent) of people with lupus surveyed whose work is affected are working part-time, intermittently or are unemployed because of lupus.

May 26. People with lupus usually are encouraged to engage in appropriate daily exercise to maintain muscle and bone strength, but they also need to balance exercise with rest.

May 27. On average, the annual cost of lupus, including expenses related to treatment and loss of productivity, exceed $20,000, and can increase to $63,000 if the kidneys are involved.

May 28. People with lupus take on average nearly eight prescription medications to manage all of their medical conditions including lupus.

May 29.  About half of all people with lupus will experience a serious infection during the course of their disease.

May 30. As many as 60 percent of people with lupus will experience some type of memory problem, such as recalling names, dates and appointments or balancing a checkbook.

May 31. With current methods of therapy, 80 to 90 percent of people with non-organ threatening lupus can look forward to having the same lifespan as people without lupus.  (I also have this one…)

Again I did not write this…

The Smiley Thumb Award

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The Smiley Thumb Award

The following are rules for the Smiley Thumb Award:

*Include the photo of the Smiley Thumb Award

*Thank the person who nominated you. Provide a link to their blog.

*Tell us what makes you smile.

*Nominate as many bloggers as you’d like.

*Include these rules in your post.

 

 

I want to thank  Lisa A.  She is such a wonderful and an amazing girl..

What makes me smile. Good Musik of course…My bf and dad.. The many wonderful and amazing people on here that I wish I knew if real life…The early morning and late night.

My nominees for the Smiley Thumb Award are the following bloggers:

Element Healing

All Things Chronic

ghostmmnc

the15thday

Sheldon Kleeman

 

Prince is dead…

Prince is dead at the young age of 57….

I am in shock!!! I am at a loss for words …He was just on IG posting pictures ..

I mean I wasn’t a huge, huge fan I loved his hit songs and the others were pretty deep lyrics ..I think he was very talented man and a mystery as well….

How and why ??? and will it come in 3’s ???

Yes I could say so much more on this post but I will just leave it like it is…

Please comment as you find out more information on his death… I just think he was to young and I heard he led a healthy lifestyle soooooo….

R I P  PRINCE….

Married 59 years without knowing love

This really upset me and I didn’t know if I should share or not. I left out most of the drama and somethings that really did not fit this post at this time or the point of this….

My dad got a phone call last night from his oldest brother Bernard and his wife Jeanette. Bernard is the oldest of the boys and in the family they had 11 kids with dad being the youngest. They grew up very dedicated I mean dedicated catholic family.

Anyways dad spoke with Bernard for a while and he was ready to rest so Jeanette wanted to speak with dad like they always do so Jeanette told my dad that she would call dad back after she got Bernard to bed since she is taking full total care of him by herself at the age of 87.

Bernard had another knee operation back on 3-22-2015 and did not follow orders and the Dr all of them told him that he would have problems as the same if he does not follow orders and do what they say. So here we are again he has the operation and they set up physical therapy, nurses coming in 3 times a day with therapy well that lasted a week with him he would not do anything and told them all to leave and never come back so his Dr called Bernard and asked what is going on his reply was I AM NOT DOING IT.. I DO NOT NEED IT the Dr and Jeanette pleaded with him but both got yelled at so that was the end of treatment..

He walks with a walker and has trouble bending his knee (his fault) he just drags his leg when he walks. He does nothing at all at ALL he expects to be waited on at all times by Jeanette.

they had 12 kids together and only one who is getting everything when Bernard passes is the oldest is Albert this has the rest of all the kids very pissed off and Jeanette pissed as well. Albert is the only one to visit them and if you speak on the phone to Bernard this is the only kid he talks about..

Jeanette took total care of her mother that she had move in with them at the time till her passing she has always been a very hard worker she did it all like they had to back in the day.

Jeanette calls dad back and she is in tears she is so tired of being the only one that Bernard will let take care of him and she feels all alone with no help at all. She has to wash him everyday from head to toe and dress him and sometimes feed him she has to stand behind him while he sometimes walks to the bathroom she has to pull his pants down and lift him back up and put the pants together for the most part at times he will just pee on himself. REMEMBER he is ABLE to do all this on his own!!!!.. He just can not bend his knee that is it! a few family members have tried to have a talk with him without any luck except getting yelled at and or kicked out or both.

Well Jeanette and dad keep talking and after about 15 minutes dad comes into my room and dad said that he just heard the most upsetting thing he has ever heard from them. Dad said Jeanette told him after 59 years of being married that Bernard has never once told her that he loves her!!!!!! NEVER ONCE.. she told dad even when they were younger spitting out kids that he never told her. she has even told family members and she found out that he never has told any of the kids that he loved them either except Albert the favorite one. Even my other Aunt went to talk to him and got the old stare down with evil in his eyes like his father used to do.

I do not know why she has lived this long with him? I think it maybe do to being very into catholic and going against the bible with a divorce Jeanette still goes to church she walks everyday and on Sunday. I know the bible said in marriage in sickness and in health but he has never told her that he loves her!! this so bothers me!!! It hurts me to know this she is one of 3 people who I looked up to heck I remember being at her house and she would be doing it all and sitting in her chair hand sewing socks for all the kids and going with her to 4 different grocery stores with coupons for the cheapest deals she did it all and now has to take total care of him for him being lazy and able and NO LOVE….

She Jeanette is the only one that sends a card to my dad since August when he had his major operation that he is still having trouble with and healing. He told Jeanette you send me a card all the time and I love it.  she said I will always send you a card every week and she continues to do so and it really makes my dad so happy..

How to live 59 years without knowing love?

I feel like I should or can do something but I’m not sure if I am allowed to know this information at all.

Dad has no idea what to tell her when she calls again if she brings it up again like she has. You can tell she is hurting inside and out it is weighing on her not only not being or shown love for a lifetime but taking care of him when he is able to but will not!!!…

Any ideas on what I could do to cheer her up (without talking to her) What would you do if this was you? or your family? What are the thoughts going  on in that head of you reading this? please share with me.

I feel blessed to have the family that I do 🙂 and the friends I have made on here and the followers I have.. all have been wonderful to me and patient with me while I deal with my illnesses/health and my dad and the very stressful times that we are having . so I thank you all from the bottom of my heart….things will get better oh and to a special someone “dude”  I’m back bitches lol love suzyQ

So please thoughts on this are all welcome 🙂

Life is to short to not experience the highs and lows of love..

Suzette

Happy to be back…Illnesses suck hog ballz…..

Hey Everyone!!.. 🙂

I wanted to put a blog post up to let you all know that I’m soooo thankful for each and everyone  “my followers” 🙂 for still being here since my health problems went fucking crazy!!!!!..

I tried to read post and comment on ones that caught my eye while I was out of bed but since I was not out of bed very long let me just say I am sure that I missed so much… I wanted to show everyone  that I was still here and nothing was wrong when in fact that I could hardly stay at the computer long enough to pay bills…I was a mess… I’VE been dealing with my fibro/lupus flares,anxiety and severe pain along with the darkness of depression….yeah I was no good or use to anyone…I failed on those test my illnesses were stronger (this time) 😉

 

So with that said I noticed one day while looking around here that I had missed so many comments and it bothers me!… so as you can probably tell that I’m doing a bit better so I want to take the time and get back to these old comments that you all took the time out of your day to write to me I want to get back to you all  I feel in order to grow and continue that I have to do this first and again it is only fair and I want to read them as well…so every comment will have a reply…. I have seen blog post where people would ask questions in the comment section or even the blogger would ask questions to followers and to my surprise the blogger would never answer the comments that ones ask…I guess some are just like that? But that my friend is not me at all….the whole idea of getting feedback good or bad or a comment and interactions that is what i want and hope to get…

So off to my comment section now then eat a nice homemade dinner that all 3 of us helped with and go from there….

I do have yet another doctors appointment in Dallas tomorrow  maybe two of them if they can work me in…. One is pain management the other one is my Lupus and arthritis Dr ………..LET US HOPE FOR GOOD NEWS…I KNOW I SURE COULD USE SOME THESE DAYS….IT HAS BEEN ROUGH!!!…..But I shall fill you all in on the good and the bad…even if you do not want to hear it haha….

So any advice on ways that have help you work thru fibro/lupus flares and chronic pain? and lets not forget the damn anxiety it was so bad that I could not focus on one single task and seemed as if I was living on my Xanax with no luck at all… I mean it is to the point that I’m not living my life at all just going thru the emotions….what do you do in these times? oh I can not leave out depression that fucker…..

hope to hear back from everyone and again I will return soon as I get back into my routine by that i mean rest from doctors office and the damn drive……